I’m pretty sure you have heard many times that a negative mind will never give you a positive life and it is kind of true! Taking everything to heart, stressing over things that we have no control over and constantly reminding ourselves about what is wrong in our lives…let’s just say you are leading yourself to not such a good life. It will take a toll on your health mentally and physically so be aware of your thoughts because that can become your life.
Something else, I realized recently is that what other people think of you is a reflection of themselves and not you. It is definitely not easy to view things that way especially with constant critcism and judgment, however, you just have to understand that your own thoughts matter more than anything else. Sometimes we get so caught up in hearing negative things from people around us that we start to think negatively even of ourselves. When that happens and you catch yourself doing that, stop for a second and ask yourself if indeed what you believe is true. For instance, if you think to yourself “I’m horrible in math” ask yourself if you have done everything you possibly can to help yourself get better. Sure you can be not so good in math but can you change that? So if the answer is yes then set a goal, write down a plan, do something to change that.
I cannot stress how important this topic is and I’m speaking from experience. If you caught yourself being negative, constantly complaining then, chances are you are missing out on all the good things you have in life. Now, I’m not saying I don’t complain because I definitely do and a sometimes I don’t even realize it. Don’t feel guilty for complaining though, that is not the point of this post. Acknowledge your feelings, your stress, your situation and don’t be harsh on yourself. Allow yourself to feel that wave of emotions and try to figure out how you can help yourself. In a way, you are trying to be your own best friend/ therapist and that’s the best thing you can do for yourself. Don’t wait for someone else to do it because nobody else will do it for you.
A lot of times, we are so focused on the bad things that are happening on a daily basis that you automatically ignore any little good thing that happens throughout the day. You start paying more and more attention to anything bad and soon start thinking that your life is depressing, that life is pointless etc… I know, it can be hard to admit that you are your own worst enemy but once you do it, it will change your life for the better and to make this clearer, I’ll give you an example. Imagine you just bought a new car and the next day you notice that many other people have the exact same car and before that, you didn’t really see that kind of car around much. Over time, it becomes so much easier for you to spot your car or any car that looks like yours and it just happens naturally. My point is when you start to deal with one thing all the time, it becomes a routine. Don’t let your negative thoughts become part of your life. You have the power to change that and it will not happen overnight so don’t stress over it. If you need help then seek help but be honest with yourself. Remember, nobody wants to be around stressors, toxic people, someone who always sees the negative in everything and if that’s the life you are leading then slowly you will feel isolated from the ones you care about.
So once you decided that you no longer want to be negative, what do you do next?
- Start your day in the morning with one question like, ” what am I grateful for?” For me, it’s usually waking up another day and having a chance to change something for the better not just in my life but in someone else’s life too!
- Do more of what you enjoy, it’s a great way to de-stress.
- Don’t be harsh on yourself, it’s ok if things don’t go your way! You are not a failure and even if things didn’t work out, you still gained something and that is the experience.
- Don’t take things to heart and I still struggle with that sometimes. Remember, not every person has been in your shoes or through your journey so if one says something that was hurtful then just ignore it. You have the power to let go of what doesn’t matter.
Whether you do something right or wrong, judgemental people will always judge. Focus on the positive comments, positive people in your life, good small things in life. Pat yourself on the back for staying strong through the hard times in your life and be your own best friend. Don’t let your negative thoughts lead your life, get a hold of it and change that frown upside down!